There was nothing they could do to stop the labor, and it was just too early.. she was just too little. On March 24, 2007, my sister's beautiful baby girl flew to heaven.
I will never understand why I am able to sit here and watch my daughter playing on the floor next to me, while my sister can only dream of what her little girl would have looked like today, or what her favorite toys & movies would have been at age 3. Each one of Chloe's birthdays, each milestone she reaches, each little dress I buy for her, are reminders of what my sister is missing. And when I'm exhausted from being up all night with a sick toddler, or when I'm complaining about her tantrums, picky eating, & whining to be held all day, I know that my sister is wishing with every ounce of her being to hold her baby again, to be up all night with her while she's sick, to deal with a thousand & one tantrums. It's just not fair.. she should be here, too.
My sister once told me that right after Zoe was born, she started noticing pink flowers everywhere she went & that now every time she sees pink flowers, it reminds her of Zoe. Today Chloe & I picked some pretty pink flowers for Zoe, & I sat for awhile with her, smelling the flowers, feeling the missing, & breathing in all that I have to be grateful for.
Happy 3rd birthday, tiny angel. We will never, ever forget you.
Love,
Auntie, Carter & Chloe x
16 comments:
I am sitting here in tears. So sad for the loss of Zoe and so grateful for our boys. Sending love to you & your family Ali xo
Oh my goodness Ali, thank you for sharing this post. I lost a baby girl in August of the same year. 6 months along, I went into labour and they couldn't stop it. I gave birth to a 1 pound, 5.7 ounce angel....her little heart beating but too little to take a breath outside the womb. I'm tearing up thinking about your sister, I know the pain, you carry it with you everyday. Your words are beautiful, and thoughtful, and caring. xoxoxo
I'm so sorry to hear about your little girl, Devon. Sending huge hugs to you. xoxo
So beautiful Ali - sending hugs to you and your sister and hugging my own girls a little bit tighter, xx
A beautiful tribute.
Oh Ali, I am here in tears. I am so sorry for the loss of little Zoe. My heart hurts for you all. Beautiful words & images!
such beautiful post Ali. i love these images with all of my heart. xoxo
I can bearly type through my tears! This was absolutely beautiful!!!
Ali, this is simply beautiful. Your words and images. Sending hugs to you and your sister.
thanks for sharing. such a sad story but written so beautifully. i will give audrey and extra big cuddle this afternoon. hugs to your sister and you. i love love love that second photo and the processing... just beautiful ali! rowe x
I feel the same way as everyone else. The photos are so beautiful too. Thanks Ali. XO.
Ali, you have written this so beautifully, my heart goes out to you and your sister. I cannot imagine such a loss, your images are such a beautiful celebration of Zoe's memory...xxoo
Beautiful post Ali, my heart goes out to you & your sister & to you too Devon! Makes me realise that I have so much to be grateful for! Your photos are stunning & beautifully processed! Sending much love & big hugs to you all xxx
thank you everyone. :)
what a heart wrenching tragedy for your sister and for yourself as an auntie. :( i can't imagine that pain.. this is a beautiful post though, ali. the images are lovely and encapsulate the emotion of wishing, beauty and heaven all at once.
I am so sorry for your sister. You are such a dear sister..I can just tell. Thanks for the heart felt posting. I love your photography, just beautiful.
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